Chattanooga 70.3 (69.1) 2025 -- Part 2

I slept ok Saturday night, probably because of the crying. So at least there was that. 

I had set my alarm for 5:50am. I got up and started getting ready. Eating was a chore. I had a banana and few bites of plain bagel with peanut butter and continued packing up my stuff. There wasn't much prep work to be done since I had laid everything out the night before. I was able to go to the bathroom and then I took what I thought would be a "just in case" Imodium since I hadn't had any issues the few days prior to the race. I grabbed my nutrition from the fridge and left the hotel around 6:30. It was a 15 minute drive to downtown. I finished the rest of my bagel on the drive over. I found parking 2-3 blocks away and walked to transition. 

Once in transition, I laid my stuff out, made friends with a woman racked a couple bikes over doing her first 70.3. I added air to my tires. Michelle eventually found me, gave me another half a banana. I was drinking a bottle of tailwind and ultima electrolytes throughout the morning. Then I went over to where my Cupcake teammates were racked to see if I could get my watch charged up at all. Something with the connect was struggling and if I wasn't holding the cable just right, it would lose connect. I went from 48% to 60% and called it. I headed back over to my rack and just hung out. I applied my first coat of sunscreen. So much waiting. 

At some point in the waiting, my insides were trying to be my outsides. I rushed to the porta-potty. It was not pretty and immediately made me sad and frustrated. All weekend I was fine, eating plainly, going to the bathroom like normal. Why did I even take that Imodium if I was still going to end up rushing to the nearest outhouse? UGH! I texted my boyfriend and my coach to lament. He told me it was probably nerves/stress related. She told me there was still a good bit of time to relax and let it settle.

Time ticked away and I eventually felt like I needed to go AGAIN. I was able to get one last trip in before it was my turn to start. All I could do was hope that was the end of it. Michelle had an earlier start position than me and started saying something along the lines of have a good race or it's going to be fine and I started to cry.  I put on another coating of sunscreen right before starting. I have gotten some nasty sunburns during long triathlons, so I am pretty cautious about it now. 

Because of the cancelled swim, the race was a time trial start. The age-groupers started at 7:45. Initially, they were sending 2 or 3 athletes every 5 seconds. Then they sped it up to evert 3 seconds. It was basically clip-in and go. No issues there thankfully. Some people are not great at getting clipped in and moving. Even the announcer was noting people's bike handling skills (or lack thereof). 

I don't think I was smiling in a single bike photo. It was definitely survival mode. Ride up this hill in front of you, worry about the next one when you get there. There was huffing and puffing and cursing. Part of me was concerned about how hard I was working and how that would effect the rest of my day. The other part knew this was the only way forward. I enjoyed every downhill and tried to use any momentum I had to help me up the next hill. I stayed on top of my nutrition. Photo evidence: 

There is one "notorious" hill on this course, Andrews at mile 26. I got off my bike almost immediately and walked up it. There was a second short steep hill around mile 43. I walked that one too. I stopped at the mile 30 aid station, as planned. I peed - a good sign hydration was on point. A volunteer helped me refill my bottles. Then back at it. Miles 38/40 through that hill at 43 felt like they took forever! A false flat section of the course for sure. The reward was worth it in a longer downhill. Then I was at the mile 45 aid station. I stopped again, this time just for sunscreen and to pour a little water on myself. The day started out overcast but the sun decided to join the party. 

I did my best to just keep riding steady. I had hoped the downhills might bump my speed enough to hit the 4 hour mark for the ride but I passed that and thought, ok how about 4:05? Well I kept pedaling and eventually made it back to transition in a time of 4:11 and about an extra half a mile. 

My coach was there to cheer me in, later telling me I looked strong coming off the bike. I felt fine physically. Mentally, I still knew my day could end before the finish line, but I was going to go out there and do my run-walk for as long as they would let me. I switched shoes, got my run bottles out of the little lunch box I had them in, reapplied sunscreen, put my race belt, vest and hat on. All the things. I was happy to be off my bike and onto the run. 

I had no idea how many people were behind me at this point. The heat of the day was revving up. I marched forward. I started throwing in some 30 second running intervals. Nothing too crazy. I have been doing 1 minute runs in training with either 4 or 9 minutes of walking. My plan was to try to start with 1 run - 4 walk. I didn't want to set up the interval on my watch both because of my precarious battery situation and because I knew there was a good chance I would have to alter the interval. I mostly was just going by feel. 

Again, nutrition was a top priority. A gel on the 15/15, tailwind on the 30/60. Prior to the race, I lamented to my coach about having to wear the vest at all, especially if I were to have a bathroom emergency. It would just give me another obstacle to get through. On the flip side, given my GI issues, I couldn't risk relying on untested aid station items. Sigh... Ok. Well obviously I ran with my vest. 

Little jog intervals here and there the first 2 miles. 17:38. 16:25. I knew 16 minute miles were a stretch but that would give me a 3:30 half marathon time. I have been able to get 16.5-17 in trainings so I wasn't too far outside the realm of possibilities.  Although that still wouldn't be fast enough for the 7:10 finish time limit that was expressed. Shortly after mile 2, my intestines were hurting. A cramp? Needing the bathroom? I wasn't sure and I wouldn't be able to go to the bathroom until the next mile. (There is an aid station approximately every mile on the run course, including porta-potties.) I mostly walked not wanting to risk any kind of incident. I spent 5 minutes in the john with no success really. 

I'm sure you are learning more about my bowel habits than you care to know. Sorry - that's just the reality I'm currently dealing with and a big part of my mental energy is spent on it. 

Mile 3 was 22 and change with that stop. Around mile 4, I somehow picked up a buddy. He wanted to walk together and I said ok. So we walked and chatted. I tried to run but the GI cramp was hurting and made running uncomfortable. Plus I REALLY did not want to have an accident in my suit. I took a gas-x chewable and kept walking. We were moving but at a slightly slower pace. Miles 5-10 were all 18-20 minutes each. We made the course cutoff for starting the second loop before 3:30 in the afternoon. 

There were fewer and fewer people out and around. There was talk of calling it after the first lap. We took the right and kept going. The clouds came back and the overcast definitely helped make that decision. Ice at every aid station to stay cool. Keeping on top of my nutrition plan. Doing what I can until they tell me to stop. But that never happened. We looked behind us and no one else is there. Are we the last ones? There is a good chance. 

Another guy catches us and walks with us for a bit before taking off. The final woman catches up and moves right along. Somewhere along the 10th mile, a staff member said we had an hour to get to some street (that I didn't know where that was) and said if we could we should probably pick up our pace. At this point I also start getting followed by the sweeper cart and cop. I realized my cramp had settled enough. I picked up the pace, not much but some. I felt pretty good actually. I pass someone! They are fading and I am hanging in strong. 

I got my pace back closer to 17 minute/mile. Chatted with the other 2 guys out there with me. One was dealing with a muscle cramp. The other was just in a miserable state and did not want to converse or be cheered on. I kept asking any staff member I saw if they were going to make us stop. The last one I asked said that unless someone tackled me I should keep going. Ok guy! Will do! 

The muscle cramp guy was able to jog it in and finished ahead of me. As I crossed the pedestrian bridge, there as Michelle!! Who selflessly walked back up a hill to come meet me and bring me in. Around the corner, my coach found us as well and was a total hype woman. A little ways down from there I could see The Cupcake Cartel waiting to cheer me in. #NoCupcakesLeftBehind through and through. As I entered the shoot, I am the second to last finisher for the day. All the high fives please. Super grateful for all these wonderful people. There were even a handful of regular spectators left cheering for the last few of us. 

The finish line. Always a beautiful sight. People were asking me how I was feeling, and truly I felt fine. I felt like I could keep going. I think I ran more in the last hour than the first 3. I was so happy they let me finish. There was so much anxiety before and during this race. That was really tough. I wanted to have a better race than Ohio 2019. Did I? By what measure? Times? No. Attitude? Maybe. I did consider calling it after the first lap. Strength and pain and fueling? Yes. Despite a gas cramp, a blister, and some bra chafing, I felt good out there on the run (walk). While I frustrated by a lot of the uncontrollable circumstances surrounding this race, despite struggling to feel excited or confident, I still SHOWED UP. I kept going even when it was hard, uncertain, a little painful, uncertain some more. I showed up in the body I have right now, and kept moving it forward, over 69 miles, to find a finish line that I haven't seen in 6 years.

Coral helped me get my stuff from transition and Michelle made sure I got my food box. Seriously was well taken care of by these 2 awesome ladies. I drank my recovery mix that Coral help put together. I went back to the hotel for an ice bath, a shower, and a change of clothes. I grabbed a burrito bowl and head back to chill with team BABE before the weekend closed out. It was interesting to hear some of them retelling their day.

I never mind being a back of the pack athlete (someone has to come in last, or second to last). But, it is telling just how different of an experience it can be. Sometimes it's lonely on the course. Sometimes aid stations are out of something or packed up completely. Big shout out to all the volunteers who stuck around and made sure we still had access to supplies. The sweepers follow you. The amount of bike bottles on this course that get ejected from the railroad track crossing is always high. Now imagine you are in the top 500 athletes to start the race, ok only 500 some chances for bottled. When you are the 2000+ athlete to start, the pile of bottles on the course have grown. Hearing someone say how nice it was to have the aid stations and not have to wear a vest. When I really didn't want to wear mine and yet don't exactly have much of a choice both because of my GI issues and the length of time I'm out there. 

Just know, that your races is yours, whatever that looks like. And what it looks like now, might not be the same as what it looks like a year or 5 from now. I am trying to remind myself of that. This year's training is not going to be the same at 2018's and I need to stop expecting it to be. 

Thank you to everyone who tracked, cheered, read this long race report. I feel really grateful to have so many people in my corner, none of which care what my finish times are. 

Chattanooga 70.3 (69.1) 2025 -- Part 1

Let's review a few things before we dive into the race day recap... 

• I started this season with the intention to SHOW UP - whatever that looked like on a given day. 
• I've been in PT since March for some hip pain (tendonitis --> tendinosis? getting an MRI next week). 
• Since 2023, I've had on-going GI issues. It caused signification weight gain after my weight had already crept up from depression. Thankfully it's no longer constant like it was when it first started, but at the same time, the episodic nature makes it very frustrating. I have yet to figure out what triggers episodes or what to do besides ride it out when one happens. It feels like hunger and nausea at the same time. It sometimes causes back end issues if you get my drift. Athletes joke "never trust a fart" and I never understood this until recently. I could have gone my entire life without being a victim to my own body like that. 
• I have MDD (major depressive disorder) and have since I was 16. It's mostly well manage by daily medication and therapy when needed. I am currently on my 11th different medication from over the years. While being active is a piece of managing depression, depression also can make it hard to be active.

The last time I did 70.3 was 2019 to celebrate my 30th birthday and it was my worst race to date. I never have wanted to quit while racing but I did that day. I was in a lot of pain (hip? hamstring? - I don't remember now and I don't think I wrote about it anywhere). At mile 10 on the run I stopped to get some ibuprofen from medical and was just over it. But a incredibly kind and stubborn volunteer basically wouldn't let me quit and walked like half a mile with me until she knew I wasn't going to stop. I crossed the finish line over the allowed 8:30 time limit, but I finished. 

Naturally, in 2020 when no races were happening due to COVID, I was in great shape. In 2021, I was trying to find a new antidepressant when mine stopped working. If you know anything about that, it's trial and error and tapering on and off  which takes time. Nothing new I was trying was working. In 2022, I had my sights set on full Ironman #2, Maryland. Then I got COVID early summer and it wiped all my fitness. 2023 was a battle with my GI tract. Last year was a slow comeback year, had some personal life things going on and training was inconsistent. I did a few local races and volunteered with a local group that helps women finish their first triathlons. So I was READY to truly get back at it this year. 

I felt pretty confident coming into this year. Determined. As the spring wore on, that confidence faded. Stomach episodes. My paces slower than ever. My hip pain not getting better and limiting my running. Way too much mental energy spent being concerned about my weight when I know I am not in a position to do anything about it. (Dieting/restriction and endurance sports don't really mix). I came into the year telling myself I can do this in the body I have right now, and I do believe that. Yet, I still find myself wishing it was smaller, the way it used to look and be, that finding workout clothes and specifically triathlon clothes wasn't a struggle.

There were some training hiccups along the way and I felt behind where I thought I "should" have been. After a not great outdoor hill session, my coach and I decided to pivot my training to have a little more bike focus the last few week leading into the race. Given that Chattanooga has a rolling hills course and I train primarily on my trainer and on flat trails here near Charleston, she added some more simulated climbing and big gear work. April did not build any volume over March because life. 

Because of a combination of where I felt my training was and my experience from the last time I did this distance, my anxiety was HIGH. Probably higher than I realized. This does not help my GI issues of course. I didn't want to have a repeat of 2019. I wasn't feeling excited for the race. I was mad at my body because these GI issues suck and I had a bad incident on one of my last long runs. I knew I would be chasing cutoffs all day, more than normal. All of this is not my ideal racing scenario. It felt like nothing was coming together. 

Then race weekend rolls around and guess what, the swim is cancelled. Heavy rains the 2 weeks leading into the race cause river flow rates to be more than double the safe limits. I found this out while I was driving to TN. Since I already wasn't feeling too excited, this didn't really cause me any distress UNTIL they said that the entire allotted time for the swim would be subtracted from the day. Meaning, that instead of having 8.5hrs to finish the race, we were told we would have 7:10 (4:10 for the bike and transition and 3:00 for the run). This does not work for me. As a 8-8.5hr finisher, this felt like the final nail in the coffin for my race. I am a mid-pack swimmer and need that extra time for my back-of-pack bike and run. And just like that, all that time was gone. 

I checked in on Friday and was assigned a bib number, 2715, indicating a 4 hour estimated bike time. I sat for the athlete briefing where I found out the timing details. Then I met up with my friend Michelle who kept me company most of the weekend. We went over to the QR factory tour where I got to meet some Cupcake Cartel teammates for the first time. We got free dinner. I didn't actually end up walking through the factory as the first group came back and said how stuffy and almost suffocating the heat and stagnant air was. I am still a little bummed about that, so maybe next trip. 

Saturday morning, Team BABE had a planned meet up at 830 for a quick group photo. Only a few of us made it but that's ok. I got to meet my coach in person for the first time.

I dropped my bike off at the QR tent for a free tune up. Although I am skeptical they did anything since it seemed like there were a couple times I shifted and my bike didn't actually change gears. Also, my bike is making a creaking noise and it's both annoying and concerning. I am worried I am over the weight limit for my bike. It's 13 years old and has held up but I seem to be inching towards a new one.
 

915 was The Cupcake Cartel team meet up. They had a great spread of bagels and other snacks but I already ate a waffle from the hotel breakfast. I had some fruit and one mini cupcake. We hung out and cheered on the kids races which was a lot of fun. Then we got a group photo. 

Then I went back to pick up my bike and rack it. It is required that you rack your bike the day before. Easier to manage the flow of 2700+ people over the course of 7 hours the day before vs 2 the morning of. After that, Michelle, Peter (her husband), and I went to get breakfast (second breakfast/lunch for me). I was trying my best to keep everything super plain and easy given my on going stomach issues. Anything I could do to not have an episode. There is another layer of frustration here from not being able to eat whatever I want, not be able to enjoy new restaurants while visiting somewhere different because I can't trust my gut. I ordered an extra side of toast thinking they were the small slices you usually get when you eat out, but to our surprise, they were sizeable. Whoops. Still ate most of them. 

It was at this point that we went our separate ways for the day. I was ready to go chill in the hotel room. I hung out and played Rollercoaster Tycoon on the Switch. I finally decide to lay my stuff out for the morning, recalibrating for a later start. I go to charge my watch and can't find the cable, which I swore I packed. Cherry on top of every other shitty feeling I was having. That's when it just all came spilling out. I was upset that I couldn't feel excited about the race, that the new course cutoff pretty much guaranteeing I won't finish, that I apparently forgot my charger and didn't check/realize til a few hours before bed. I was mad that my financial situation makes racing a rarity and that I can't afford to stay downtown where everyone else was. Both Michelle and Cuppies were kind enough to offer some time of charging in the morning in transition while we waited for the race to start. So at least that was one problem solved. 

Race day coming in part 2... 

Ironman Louisville 2018 - Part 3

So I have one last post to write about Ironman Louisville. I went back and forth on whether or not to talk about this, but it was a part of my experience and I think it's important to share.

In the midst of seeing the finish line, I know the announcer called my name even if I don't recall hearing it. I walked under the arch, and a volunteer was placing a medal around my neck. I got a hug from my sister and one from my coach. I made everyone give me group hug. It was an amazing moment. Years of dreaming. Months of work. Hours on the course. And just like that it was over. I headed back to the hotel and got a shower. I laid down and got about 2 or 3 hours of sleep. I was sore. I was riding the high of one of the greatest days of my life.

I was on the the facebook group, seeing other people post about not being able to sleep. I went back into the ironman tracker app to look over my time, to see the results of all this hard work I had put in. There was a notification showing up in the event messages. Upon opening it, my heart immediately sank.

Just as a friendly reminder, my finish time was 15:18:52. Which now, according to this update, meant I didn't officially finish. Most of you (triathlete or not) will say "who cares?" Whether ironman officially recognizes my finish doesn't change the fact I covered the course, I did it in really tough conditions, and I still got to run down the chute and get my medal. So many people were behind me through this process and on race day. I know even if I hadn't finished, it wouldn't have changed their opinions about me. No one, except me, would have been disappointed. But, it still felt embarrassing in a way to say I finished but not really. It was confusing to those who listened to me explain that my results were disqualified after the race was over despite the fact I finished. 

My coach's initial response to me telling her that my results weren't going to be official were, "ummmmm  fuck that." Hahaha I absolutely love her. We tried to make sense of a seemingly arbitrary updated cutoff but neither us of really understood. Cait got an update from the timing tent at the finish line while I was still out on the course about how long I had to finish. They told her that the finish line was going to close at 12:56AM. I finished at 12:35AM. She then told me I would have found 2:52 (which I wholeheartedly also believe) and told me not to think twice about it. 

My sister who was still with me that morning shared in the frustration, although not disappointed in me for one second. But I'm sure in some sense even angrier than I was to have to witness the rug being pulled out from under me. My other sister had a great response as I tried to explain to a friend on twitter about my unofficial finish. 

And the support and amazing responses continue. I asked Linden how he felt about running a half marathon at midnight with me for no reason now that my results didn't "count."

Anyone I told about the situation had similar responses. Whatever the internet says doesn't change the fact that I did it. I'm an ironman whether ironman tells me I'm one of not. I can't say I wasn't hurt by the updated cutoff. At one point on the run, I still had enough mental capacity to do math and even told Drew and Linden that if they adjusted the overall cutoff in line with the adjusted swim cutoff, we should have only been allotted 15 hours and 10 minutes to finish. I also went on to say that I wouldn't have made that. At the time I was struggling through the back half of the marathon. 3 minutes I definitely could have found. 9 minutes would have been a lot tougher. Drew reassured me that had the swim gone as originally planned, had the weather not been what it was, I would have had a totally different day. And that no one was questioning my ability to finish before the cutoff, on an ideal day or the day I was given.

 I cried on my drive back home from Louisville. I felt robbed. Despite the encouragement and outrage others shared with me, it didn't change the fact that I had been blind-sided with DNF.  I don't think there is any shame in DNF, especially not on the tough day we were dealt. I said going into the race, that no matter what happens I was going to be proud of myself for the effort I put forth up until that point. I declared that even embarking on this ironman journey was a big, bold, brave thing. I believe that. Ironman isn't easy. It's not supposed to be. But when you spend an entire day racing based on a certain piece of information, just to find out after the race is over that you don't have correct information, it just plain sucks. It makes me wonder how many of the people that run ironman events have actually participated in them. Knowing course cutoffs is a critical piece of information, especially for slower athletes like myself. 

There are all sorts of discussions happening surrounding this debacle. Some people question whether or not those of us that received a DNF after-the-fact would have been able to finish the race under the original time constraints to begin with. Some people told us to train harder and try again. Had I truly DNF'ed, I don't think these comments would have seemed so elitist. One of the things I love about triathlon is the wide variety of people you find on the course, from professionals to recovering addicts to average Janes like myself. There are so many reasons people test themselves through ironman. To assume someone didn't train hard enough, or phoned it in because they thought they had extra time to finish is just ignorant. I am grateful that all the people I know and who I had direct conversations with about this don't share that same attitude. 

I submitted an inquiry through the tracker app about my finish time and the updated cutoff. I received a standard response about the math behind the update cutoff and that it was determined after the race because they had no good way of figuring it out or communicating it during. It really left me feeling sour about ironman. I know they are a corporation. I know they are in it for the money. A lot of the things that I've experienced as a back-of-the-pack-er already have me feeling like ironman doesn't care about their athletes, especially the slower ones. It's hard to be offended by the elitist comments people make when it sometimes seems like ironman themselves try to cultivate that mentality. 

On the flip side, their motto is "anything is possible." This morning Cait messaged me asking if I had seen someone's post about his finish time being reinstated. I had not. But I went over to the group and read through the thread. After that, I replied to the previous response I got about cutoff times. I never disagreed with an updated cutoff. But, it's hard to race when you don't have all the information you need. How could I possibly have done anything differently when I didn't know I was so close to making the cutoff that didn't even exist yet? It really is mind boggling. At this point, over a week later, I had already accepted my fate. I knew my results weren't official, but that I finished. I had my medal, although I honestly thought about throwing it away. Not even kidding a little bit. I didn't want to look at it. It was just a reminder of how close I really got. But then something unexpected happened. 

Just when I thought ironman truly couldn't care less, I got this response. And just as when I first stepped onto the carpeted finish line, I shouted "fuck yeah!" in the middle of the lab at work today. I went home on my lunch break and cried. My emotions are always on a rollercoaster. But the last 10 days have been wilder than I could have imagined. I know I didn't need ironman to recognize my finish for me to consider myself an ironman. What makes someone an ironman isn't race results on the internet. It's the early morning workouts. It's the long hours alone on my bike trainer. It was 139 miles in the rain and cold that I toughed out on race day. But, it is nice for them to acknowledge the poor communication and the overall crappy situation and change my results back to being an official finisher. This outcome is the difference between me racing this event again or not. I look forward to a sunnier day on the Louisville course. 

I did want to say a few words to a few people... 

Nicole - Thank you for making the trip down to be at my race. I was only as calm as I was because you were there. I know it was a miserable day to spectate a race just as it was to race the race. But you stuck it out til almost 1AM. Thanks for keeping the rest of the family updated. I know we didn't do much and I know it went by fast (at least for me) but I truly am glad you were there to see me come down the finisher's chute. Full circle from giving my first triathlon medal 7 years ago.  

To the rest of my family - thanks for all the support from afar. It would have been nice to have you there but I know you were thinking of me. I was happy to read the notes you all wrote for my special needs bag. Thank you for being proud of me even when I felt like I no longer deserved the accolades. But of course thank you for reminding me that I fought for my day and earned it whether my results were "official" or not. 

Caitlin - Oh my gosh. I could write a whole post just for you. You started triathlon only a little bit before I did. But as our friendship grew, so did we both into the sport. The dream of my ironman finish line always had you there. Thank you for making that part of this dream a reality. I am so grateful to have you for a coach but more so to have you as my friend. Never have you made me feel like I am less than because of what I look like or the pace I go. (although my own insecurities try to get me to think that way sometimes). Thank you for seeing me through some of the toughest times. You've always supported, prioritized, and tried to understand my ongoing battle with mental health. It's been an amazing season. I finally broke 8 hours for 70.3, I did my first ironman which included a marathon PR, and just return to triathlon after 2.5 years and staying injury free this season were wins without all the other great things. I am so so excited to continue this journey together. 

Drew - Thank you for being out on the course. You could have just as easily stayed back at the finish line with everyone else but instead you were out on the bike, checking in with me. Thanks for telling me the pain I was in was normal. Thanks for telling me to drink some coke. They may seem like little things, but when all my energy was being spent on continuing to move forward, they were much needed reminders.  

Linden - I've said it already a few times, but thanks doesn't feel like enough. I hope you know how much of an impact your seemingly random act of kindness had on my race day and on me in general.  

And thanks to everyone who cheered me on and congratulated me. 

Thanks for reading these entries if you did/if you made it this far. I hope you enjoyed the insight into what was a very interesting first ironman experience. 

P.S. I already tried to get Caitlin to let me race another ironman... Florida next weekend. She said no. 😂 But there will definitely be more ironman racing in my future. Maybe just not 2 weeks post my first one.

Ironman Louisville 2018 - Part 2

So, when we left off I had just gotten off of my bicycle. I took my bike shoes off to aid the walk/jog back to transition. I got my run bag. I had pack running capris and I am glad I did. Going into the race, I hadn't planned on changing in T2 but I was so cold and wet that it was necessary. It was tough though for a few reasons. The first one being that I didn't think to put a towel in my T2 bag. So I didn't really have anything to dry off with. Changing clothes when wet is a work out in and of itself. And when you can't feel, well anything really, it's hard to get dressed.  I somehow managed to get changed. Dry clothes, especially socks, felt amazing. I stopped to use the porta-potty and then I was on my way. I happened to run into my old boss Bill coming out of transition. It was great to finally run into him. It was both our first ironman. A quick how's it going, good to see you, and he was on his way. Heading out onto the road, Meredith informed me I had to keep a 15:15 minute per mile pace or better to finish in time. This was perfect news as 15 minute miles was my plan. I was feeling really good. T2- 16:38.

I just started plugging away. I was running slightly under 15 minute miles and felt really good. My heart rate was back down to my zone 1. I saw Nicole who was out with her sign. I'm pretty sure I gave her a quick hug and was on my way to run a marathon.  Despite the fact, or maybe because, I spent 15 hours on the course much of it is a blur already. At some point I saw Drew who told me Caitlin was up ahead. When we crossed paths, she stopped and gave me a hug. I asked her how she was doing and again, the exact response escapes me except for one thing, "we always find a way. right?" It was a tough day for anyone and everyone. Crew Racing's motto is Always Find A Way - because that's what we do. We keep putting one foot in front of the other any way we can and know how. I continued on my way. I felt great through mile 10 then the day caught up with me. Miles 12 and 13 were my slowest. I saw an old teammate, Linden, from when I worked with my previous coach Kim, as I was on my way to the turn around. Again, another encounter that is blurry now. He probably asked me how I was doing and whatever my response was could tell I was starting to struggle. He asked me if I wanted him to run with me for a minute, and I told him I would see him around the other side once I went through special needs and started the second lap. I saw Todd Nixon, the other leader of Spirit Us Tri Club (formerly known as Best Tri Club ever - an awesome virtual tri club for althetes of all levels). I got a fist bump and some encouragement. I know I saw my sister again somewhere in here. It's seriously amazing to me how much of this I already don't remember.

The Ironman Louisville course is cruel in the fact that they split the course for second lap runners and finishers a block in front of the finish line. I guess in some ways it's good motivation but mostly it's just evil. So there was the finish line. I made a right turn to special needs and began my second lap. I had a lot of things in my special needs bag. But honestly, I knew I didn't have a ton of time. I didn't think changing my socks would make any difference at this point so I skipped that. I didn't want to eat anything. I typically have a hard time eating even sports nutrition while running so I didn't take any of the special treats I packed and didn't even take any of the second half gels I had in there either. I did grab 1 thing, the notes I asked my family to write and send me. They definitely were the bright spot I needed in that moment. I was happy I made it to that point so I was able to see them. A few steps down the road I came back across Linden. He started walking with me. He told me Drew was up the road. So we went ahead and eventually found Drew.

He asked me how I was doing. I told him my hamstrings were tight and everything was hurting. He said that was totally normal. Then he checked my nutrition status. I told him I really didn't want to eat or drink anything. He said, go for the coke and redbull. Get some caffeine and keep moving. If anything sounds appetizing at all, eat it. If not, just pass on by. I had to get back to my 15 min/mile pace to finish. So I pressed on. Linden continued running with me.  At some point he decided and informed me he was going to stick with me for the rest of the run. I was in too much pain and was too focused on continuing to move forward to think about it. I didn't argue or protest, which under normal circumstance I definitely would have. I didn't worry about if there would be consequences. There is a rule that no outside assistance is allowed. People have been disqualified from ironman races for things as silly as having a loved one hand them a chapstick. But again, I didn't care.

The first aid station we passed after we parted from Drew I took a redbull and coke. And I got a second wind. I was able to get back under 15 minute miles for a little while. But the course seemed to drag on. It was dark. There were far fewer spectators and athletes on the course at this point. I just kept moving. And right there was Linden, for some reason. He had spent hours prior to this hanging out with his other tri team spectating and cheering the run course. Also, I'm pretty sure he had been drinking. Oh, and, he and I met for the first time on Friday at team dinner. So here was this person that I barely knew, helping me along, telling me I was doing great, telling me I was going to make it, running with me at 11:30 at night. It's not uncommon to find another athlete along the way and stick together for a while, to share in the misery of the moment that are the late night marathon miles of an ironman. But, this was different. I honestly don't know what possessed him to do it. I guess Drew and/or Cait had talked to him and there was some vague plan of him going with me for a bit. Somehow that turned into the rest of the second lap. Cait later told me he wanted to. What kind of crazy person wants to run a half marathon at midnight with someone they barely know? Although what kind of crazy people do ironman races? Ha! We are a special breed I suppose. Let me move on from my astonishment of his company for a minute.

He had to hear me say, shit, oh god, everything hurts, and ask repeatedly if I was going to make it. Never did he seem annoyed or worried. He just kept telling me I was doing great and I was going to make it. He may have told me the turn around was close when it wasn't, but I'm going to let that one slide. I told him to talk to me, to literally tell me anything to distract me. And so we jogged and chatted. We may have started out barely knowing each other, but over the course of the next 10 miles we got to know each other a little better. He checked with me at every aid station if I wanted anything. Sometimes he pushed me to go a little harder. And he respected when I told him not yet. And we continued on. He seriously was like my ironman marathon guardian angel.

Eventually we made it back to Churchill Downs and there was Drew again. I'm pretty sure he told me the time the finish line was going to close and told me I was going to make it. He rode along on his bike for a few minutes, telling me how everyone else had done for the day. New and old teammates getting on the podium. He reminded me to drink something if I felt I could. I really wanted water and the aid station we passed didn't have any. Drew saw a bottle and tossed it on the ground towards me. He said it wasn't outside assistance if I picked it up off the ground. This was another moment of not caring, even though a race vehicle was right in front of us when this happened. The bottle had rolled away from me and back towards him. He picked it up and handed it to me. Getting some water was more important than a potential rule violation and it's not cool that they didn't have any water at the aid station anyway or least not any ready in a cup to hand to me as I passed. It's not like I was moving that fast either. So I think they didn't have any. I don't know. Anyway... Drew snapped a picture to send to Cait and headed back to the finish line and told me he'd see me there.

I had 3 miles left. Then 2. Then 1. Linden lead the way and I followed. Soon he said just a left turn, a right turn and you're there. There was the faint noise of the crowd. We made the left. Then the right. And then there was the most glorious thing I've ever seen - my ironman finish line. I made it. It was exhilarating. I gave Linden a huge hug and said thank you (I think) and took off. People were beating on the boards. I couldn't hear the announcer call my name but he told me he did. The moment I first stepped onto the carpet, I shouted "FUCK YEAH!" And a woman standing down there yelled it back at me. She got a high five. A few other high fives. I looked for my sister but couldn't really see any faces the closer I got to the arch. There were very bright lights and I ran towards them arms raised. Run 6:36:04 (a marathon PR). Total time 15:18:52.

And just like that, my day came to an end. 138+ miles, 15+ hours later, a volunteer was putting a medal around my neck and congratulating me. I did it! Melissa Workoff, YOU. ARE. AN IRONMAN! A huge smile was plastered on my face. Passed the arch and the lights, Cait and Nicole were to the left of me, both teary. Hugs. All the hugs. Group hug. Then the volunteer came back to take me to get my picture taken with my medal. A very long day of self perpetual forward motion. It was absolutely incredible. We took some more pictures after I came out from the finisher's area. Nicole asked if I wanted to walk down to the food, I told her no. I really still didn't feel like eating anything. I chatted for just a few minutes with everyone and then Nicole and I walked back to the hotel, which I conveniently chose less than a block away from the finish line.

I had written a post prior to the race saying that no matter what happened, I felt like even taking on this endeavor to begin with was a big and brave thing. I toed the starting line when others didn't due to weather conditions. I was able to execute my race day plan despite not being presented with the day I was expecting.  I planned to remain grateful and keep moving forward, and I did just that. Even in the cold, I was happy. Even through the pain and fear, I was grateful.

This may be my favorite picture ever. 

I have some personal shout outs & thank you's to write, along with some overall thoughts about this crazy journey I've been on for a while now. So I'll wrap everything up in one last post, tomorrow!

Ironman Louisville 2018 - Part 1

Wow! What a day. My triathlon journey has been leading to this one day for literally years. My sister asked me why I wanted to do Ironman, other than the natural progression of longer distance racing. But after my first sprint triathlon, I dreamed this big dream of being called an Ironman. The years passed. Injuries came and went. Life had its ups and downs and turns. But, here I am. It came and went. It's over. All the long workouts. All the worry (honestly, there wasn't TOO much worry). I swam. I biked. And I ran and walked and jogged. And, I crossed the finish line.

There is so much to say about the day. Leading up to the weekend, the chance of rain crept up. I was upset about that. Then my coach told me I know better than to spend time on anything outside of my control. My sister also told me to get it out of my system now, early, that way on race day I don't give it any more mental attention. Both things were great pieces of advice and really worked.

I really wasn't feeling too nervous leading up to race day. I drove up to Louisville Thursday after work. I dealt with my athlete check-in stuff Friday morning before having to pick up my sister from the airport. I also had time to make a quick walmart run. The walk down to transition on Friday morning to get my packet was enough for me to know my hands would be freezing on the bike, rain or no rain. I found a decent pair of gloves for $10 and it may have been the best $10 I spent all weekend.

We had team dinner on Friday night. I got there early so I could have a couple minutes with my coach before everyone else started showing up. We continued to discuss wardrobe decisions and race plans. She reminded me that one of her best marathons was in a downpour at the end of Ironman Texas. I chatted with my old teammates, met some of my new ones.

 Saturday, I got out on my bike and tested out the gloves. I was able to shift and control my bike with them on which was most important. And they definitely were better than the basic $1 knit ones I had as my original emergency gloves. That was followed by a quick run around the block. I mixed my nutrition and packed up all of my transition and special need bags. Then we went down to drop that stuff off. The volunteer in transition who helped me rack my bike was the one that got my red volunteer bracelet. They give the athletes these bracelets at check-in to give to a volunteer to show appreciation. I honestly wish I had 100 to give away. All the volunteers all weekend were amazing.

We had a late lunch and then just lunged around all afternoon. I walked about 7 miles on my rest day Friday and my ankles were a little sore. I actually got them taped on Saturday, probably more for a mental reassurance than anything else. There were lots of good cartoons on TV. Perfect way to chill. Just having my sister there with me, even if all we were doing was watching tv made a huge difference in my pre-race nerves. It was a big day and even though I knew other people that would be out there racing or spectating on the course, it's not the same as having someone there to calm your nerves prior to the race.

I think the fact that I got the weather worries out of the way earlier in the week, I wasn't really thinking about it too much on Saturday. Friday and Saturday were pretty nice days. Cool, a little bit windy but sunny. It did make me a little bitter but again, nothing I could do about it and it wasn't going to change the plan I had going in. My coach and I talked about it before the weekend even started. I was aiming to swim a 1:30, bike 8 hours, and run 15 minute miles. She calculated my day with 6 minute transition times and this would have left me with about 14 minutes to spare before the 16:30 cutoff.

Wake up on Sunday morning and it's already raining. The weather called for "a bit of rain." The hourly  forecast for the day went over 50% only 2 or 3 hours, nonconsecutive - LIES!. I waited a while to get dressed. And then waited some more to start our walk down to transition. Since I had already dropped all my bags, I really didn't need to go down for anything other than to double check my bike. I did add a little air to my back tire and then it was time to head towards the swim start. We stopped under the bridge and I took off my warm morning clothes and traded up to a wetsuit. We then continued our walked. Eventually we came down to the lawn where people we lining up for the swim start. This is a self seeded swim and I positioned myself in the 1:20 to 1:30 group. Then we continued to wait. There really wasn't much going on. Nicole played some music for me on her phone. I even got to hear "Remember the Name" which she didn't know was one of my and Cait's songs.

7:25 came and went. This was when the professionals were supposed to start. Eventually, information got around that the swim was being delayed. And it was going to be shorted. I guess the rain from overnight and the morning added to the river and the current was too strong to swim the course as planned. They cut what was supposed to be a 2.4 mile swim down to 0.9 miles, all down stream. Honestly, I wasn't phased. It was not within my control. It would upset a lot of first-timers to know their course was being shortened. But safety is top priority and I didn't want to get sucked down river so I was perfectly ok with the situation. Caitlin had texted me to tell me nothing changes with the plan, but I didn't have my phone with me. Although, I just assumed as much anyway. They finally started the professionals at 8:00. The age groupers started around 8:15 I think. They were sending swimmers in 1 at a time in an attempt to keep the bike course from getting to crowded. I was able to see Cait go by starting the bike before I even made it down to the dock. I continued to mosey down the line. My sister gave me a hug and I left to head down the ramp. It was definitely slow going. The delayed start and anticipation of getting in the water, my emotions were running high as I was about to begin my first Ironman. It was a day that not that long ago felt out of reach. It was a dream I almost considered giving up on. But there I was, about to go forth and put my training, my body and my mind to the test. I started crying. A very nice woman in the crowd encouraged me. Then of course my fellow athletes began talking to me and it calmed me down. Finally it was my turn to get into the water! And so began my 140.6 (ok, well I guess 139.1) journey.

The swim was a bit frustrating. The water was definitely strong. They were shouting directions at us the whole time we were in the water. This made it hard to focus on swimming. It was difficult to see since it was still raining. The water was also steaming since it was 20 some degrees warmer than the air temperature. I don't even know how many buoys were still out there in positions that were actually for us to use for sighting. They kept telling us to swim right. We needed to pass under the bridge with a certain pillar to our left. Yet, almost as soon as we made it under the bridge they started yelling at us to swim left. It was challenging. Pro's were in and out in 12 minutes. My swim time was 17:40. Out of the water and I got some cheers from Swim Bike Mom - Meredith Atwood. I ran over and gave her a hug.

Then I hustled on into transition. The tent was crowded! I was able to find a chair and a volunteer. I had her put some vaseline on under my bra strap, a hot spot for chaffing. Long sleeve bike jersey on. I cleaned up and dried off my fee the best I could. Although I am not sure in the grand scheme of the day socks mattered on the bike all that much. Socks and bike shoes on. Helmet. Glasses. Gloves. GO! My volunteer told me I was quick. There was no point to changing out of my wet tri shorts since it was still raining a decent amount. Cait and I talked about transition as a good place to shave time. So I really did my best to not waste time there. However the wet conditions on the concrete made it precarious to try and run in bike shoes leading up to the mount line. I honestly can barely walk in my bike shoes to begin with. I made it to the mount line, got on my bike, and went on my way.  T1 10:03.

As I said, at the start, it was raining decently. For the rest of the day, it rained. I think there were a few 20 minutes sections were it wasn't raining but honestly it didn't matter or make a difference. I rode by Nicole who waited for me on the stretch of rode we were on down by the swim start. And so it began. A very long bike ride. My longest bike ride to date. I ate an uncrustables right away. I was hungy before I even started the swim due to the delayed start and long line to get into the water. I knew the cold would make it hard to stay on top of nutrition and fluids. It's hard to be motivated to eat and drink when you are freezing. My legs and feet were numb pretty much from the beginning but I just kept pedaling. Hills came and went. Miles ticked off. I made it to La Grange which is a viewing spot they actually shuttle spectators out to. It was great to hear people cheering. I even got some high fives! And a personal shout from my friend and old teammate Cheyenne.  It's always great to hear someone calling your name. It's such a boost. This was about 30 miles into the bike. I was very focused on continuing to move forward. When I first got on my bike, my HR was high, which is usually the case for me. Even though the first few miles of the course are relatively flat, I have a hard time getting it to come down. Then I started hitting the hills and I honestly couldn't worry about it. It was going to be what it was and I had to keep biking, even it my HR was high. It did start to settle down a little. It came down when I coasted the down hills. And then spiked again as I got winded going up hill. I definitely need to do more hill work if I am going to do this course again.

Two primary thoughts I had throughout the ride: I can imagine this is a gorgeous ride on a nice day. I'm cold but happy. I continued to bike.  Honestly, I feel like there isn't too much to say about the bike. I got it done. It was cold. It was hard to eat with my glove on. But I still was able to manage. I stopped at special needs to grab my second half nutrition. I asked what time it was. 2pm. I believe the cutoff for being on the second lap of the bike was 2:30 which means I was in good shape. I also was about 4 hours into my ride at this point,  a little more than half way and on track for my 8 hour overall bike time. I did have to make a pit stop for the bathroom at an aid station down the way because the ones in special needs were crowded.  The course was crowded on my first loop which is normal. The faster athletes on the course were coming around on their second loop while the rest of us were on our first. Crowded course and the wet road conditions are probably not the best mix.

Coasting some of the downhills was honestly scary. Wet roads and 30 mph downhill on a bicycle probably not the safest scenario. This did cause an overall slow down to my bike. Also, similar to driving a car, when the person in front of you is breaking, you break. And if you don't want to break, odds are there is someone about to speed past you on the left and you have to break anyway.  I got caught behind people going slower than I would have up hill once or twice. I dealt with these encounters as they arose and that's all I could do.  Eventually, almost exactly 8 hours from when I started, I was back at the dismount line. What a beautiful sight!

Official bike time - 7:58:30.

To be continued...  Second transition, a marathon, and the finish to come in part 2. :)